Bathrooms are important. Particular Europeans laugh at the signifigance and gold plated glory of American bathrooms. Fart jokes, poop jokes, matching blue towels with initials, coordinating colors, walk-in, step-down. Privacy. It never stops except in truck stops.

Give up ownership of bathrooms in truckstops. Walk in to the smell of human waste and laxitives first thing in the morning. Take your tooth brush out of your pocket and stand at the sink with a woman on each side and try to focus both eyes together at the mirror. Or don't. The face in the mirror, no shower in three days, has just been splash dabbed in Utah, in Kansas, in Illinois, with rest area water.

There are two women to the right. They push their hair this way and that. One pulls out the eleastic and reties her pony tail. They press lipstick to their mouths and check what they can of where their capris meet their blouses. They twitter like birds.

I sigh with relief as they walk out the door.