August 5th, a small list

Tony falls 10 feet onto his head on a cement floor: $3000
Cancel Colorado vacation
Lightning hits our internet: $300
I wash my phone and dry it: -$300, +$30
Lessons are cancelled, Sudi's dog Gypsy dies

"Remember I wrote that message to you, Peggy? If we were still young, we'd just go ahead and do it. You'd give your notice and move to Boulder." The staff lunge has no windows. One wall is lockers. One has the bathroom door, no sound proofing, and a sink. I report off to Peggy from across the tiny table.

Peggy does remember. But now there are two mortages. Rent the house in Yakima. The Cle Elum mortgage is low. Nurses find jobs. Then I say, listen, just move to Boulder and fly back for your six nights on and back to Boulder for your nine days off. What? Keep commuting until you get a Boulder job. Peggy says it would hardly be more expensive. Peggy is looking off and not seeing the lockers.

I kind of did that last year. I owned this land here for five years. I built the barn and then I waited and waited and waited.
There has to be a line in the sand you step across.
The house was being built, we lived in the barn. The horses had two stalls, we had one. Water came from the neighbor's hose. Made my way through the mud, to the porta-potty,, hiking boots, clean pants with the cuffs rolled up, clean shoes in the car. Started driving through the mountains while the coyotes were still trailing it home. Came back three days later.

I don't know why it gets harder while you get older. It's said that you know more. What if it is just slow metabolism? You just don't have the fire. I say: then just pretend.