Dissemble: to give false or misleading appearance; conceal the real nature, feign. 2 1/2 days in New York City. There are many things. I talk too much about when I was young because now: I am not young. There is a hunger to live up to standards of the Carlyle Hotel. I am so much a nurse and talk to everyone, the elevator men, the waitress. Sometimes I do not produce sound but inside I talk. I walk with my beautiful daughter. Was she always this much taller? It is my own spine. It was my own choice to make my hair pink. Everything about me has too much color. I have always been white dough. I do not know dissemble. What I do know is: we walk past the Park-Midtown. The trees stretch over the brickwall, reach up and arc. We are walking side by side traveling Uptown. The old women that walk towards me are walking- Downtown. They are sharp rocks in a wash of whitewater. They hold my eyes. They do not blink. The old women smile. Their legs are bowed. Sometimes there is a man. Sometimes not. They walk alone in the dark with street lamps. The cobbled sidewalk heaves and sinks. I want to be an old lady walking along the park in New York, crook legged, crow's eyes and a slight smile.